Join the Club

Mayonnaise is thinly applied
After the bread is toasted
As well as ample bacon fried
Or in the oven roasted.

Sliced poultry or ham is what you need
On three slices of white.
Lettuce and tomato are decreed
Before you take a bite.

Ingredients are second-hand
To the sandwich structure.
Frilly toothpicks make it grand
And turn it into sculpture.

Slice diagonal once, then twice
As triangles taste better.
Lay them in a circle so nice
Add chips within the center.

Change the meats, change the bread,
Change the condiments.
Keep the picks, the stacks, and let
Triangles hold occupance.

I used to listen to Mitch Hedberg. I still do, but I used to, too. Would a poem about club sandwiches really be right without reference to his brilliant comedy? I suppose if I were a square.

But I’m pretty cool.

The club is claimed to be named for “Chicken and Lettuce Under Bacon. It’s also claimed to be named for the Union Club in New York. Often referred to as a “Clubhouse Sandwich,” there is credence to this theory. But, like the Reuben, it seems the truth is lost to time. Overtime, the structure has certainly overtaken any ingredients’ importance. For a long time, I was under the impression a club was roast beef, turkey, and ham on the same sandwich. But what do I know?


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