31: Lists!

Here is a list that I wrote.


1)  “Hello.  I have been missing and have not updated in a while.”

This is obnoxious and self-pitying.  No one cares.  I don’t even care when I do this – I space out and all of sudden the blog is updated and I’m all “how did that happen?”

2)  My Name.  How did they find that?  Usually it’s one of the other “Matthew Abels” out there and while many of them are pretty cool, a lot of them are terrible.  You have to really filter out the good from the bad.

3)  Lists.

What an outmoded and trite form of communication.  Can we move beyond the lists, please?  I understand as humanity we want to categorize and tabulate but its very frustrating.  Lists are the reason we had the lame Pluto controversy and I’ve had it with them completely.

4)  Self-Referential Humor

We get it.  You’re aware you’re being hypocritical or meta or whatever.  Dude.

5)  Complaints about trash disposals.

Just take the bull by the balls and clean it out yourself.  You don’t need a plumber for it.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s